As many of you will know, there are lots of online survey things out there. I happen to like surveys. I belong to several survey groups. I think they're fun, to be honest. And some of them actually reward you. I've made a few bucks here and there, gotten some gift certificates, that sort of thing.

Yesterday, upon completing a survey, I was offered my choice of several free things. Most of them were email subscriptions to different lists... everything from golf tips to make-up tips to financial tips. One offer stood out, though. It was an offer for a free personality test.

I like personality tests, too. I just get a kick out of these things. (In case you're wondering, on the Keirsey sorter, I'm an Idealist; complementing that well, I'm also a Style One in the Enneagram model.)

Anyway, I got the email for the free test and clicked on the link. There I saw a welcome page that I mostly ignored, then on the second page I saw, among other things:

It is our policy not to send your OCA Personality Test results by e-mail.

There are two reasons for this.

• One is out of respect for your privacy. The test is a serious one, which provides a revealing look at your strengths and weaknesses. The results are for you only.
• Secondly, and more importantly, correct interpretation of these results requires a skilled evaluator. Your test graph itself shows you very little without the assistance of a trained evaluator and is prone to misinterpretation. While the graph shows you your rating on 20 different personality traits, it is the interrelationship of these points, which provides additional layers of insight visible only to the skilled evaluator.

For this reason, it is standard that the final test results are only given to you IN FULL by a trained test evaluator at one of our centers. When you have completed your test and sent it in, it will be scored by computer and you will be alerted by e-mail or through an invitation at your mailing address (if you do not have e-mail) as to the location, date and time for your test evaluation. Again, there is NO charge or obligation for this service.

Now, I found their second reason to be pretty doubtful. I mean, come on. Still, the words "NO charge or obligation" carry a lot of weight with me, so I read further. And this is what I read:

To find out about your appointment or change the date or time to fit your needs, you can call the following number: 1-800-367-8788

Or email: info@scientology.net

Whoa! Scientology???

Immediately, I looked up at the URL I'd been redirected to, and sure enough, it was a subpage of scientology.org.

My initial reaction was to just say bye-bye and high-tail it outta there. Then I got to thinking... Let's see what their personality profile said about me, even without the "professional analysis." So I took it.

First it asked for all the standard info... name, address, etc. Then, using my ZIP code, it gave me choices to pick the Church of Scientology nearest me. I did so.

As I clicked 200 different Yes-No-Maybe answers, I found myself reading each question with a bit of a bias. Knowing this group for what it is, I read the questions as though they were trying to figure out whether I'd be a good little cultist. As it turns out, that's the only sensible way to look at these questions, since the graphed results I was given sure didn't make a lot of sense. (I know... I have to have a "professional" analyze it...)

Of the ten traits the graph charted, three of mine fell into the "ATTENTION URGENT" category. This is apparently meant to scare the test-taker into thinking their life needs to be turned around, but quick! This is emphasized by the line, "Something can be done to change conditions in life," which appears on the results page in bold print... just before showing again the address of the Church of Scientology nearest me.

So whaddaya think? Should I pay them a visit? I'm sure they'll ask me how I heard of Scientology. I'll mention Operation Clambake.

E-mail me!